The One That Got Away~Keep it at the Ready

Amazed at the beauty of the ice, I knew I had to capture it on film. I raced inside to retrieve my digital camera. My heart was pounding. I could see the shot in my head.

Back outside in the cold, I peered through the lens of the digital cam. The ice crystals glistened. Focusing through the naked Bradford pear tree caused the light to become fractured, this was a magnificent effect. I had my shot! As I engaged the shutter a red light flashed, indicating the battery to be too low to make the shot. What!

I had just charged the battery three days ago! This could not be happening! Back inside the house I ran, ready with plan B. I would use my first love. Tom had given me my first 35 mm camera almost thirty years ago, all manual settings. I could set my own F~stops and control the lighting myself. All the better. I went to the hall closet and grabbed the old camera bag. The miles that old bag had seen. The broken leather against my skin felt like an old friend. I turned the 35 on, juice! I opened the bag wider searching for a roll of film. I dug deeper, no film. I carried the bag to the middle of the room and carefully dumped it upside down. All manner of photo paraphernalia fell out but no roll of film. This could not be happening! Think! Again outside with the iPhone. I knew the quality would be poor but at least I would have something.

I took several shots with the iPhone at different angles. Finally the solution came to me. Put the d~cam battery on the charger for maybe an hour. That should give it enough charge to power a couple of shots. Provided the fog didn't change during that time it should work. I hooked all the electronic gadgets up and curled up on the couch to wait it out. Flash joined me, ready to settle in. I smoothed his basset brow and realized had it not been for him and his pea sized bladder I would still be sleeping. Thank you Flash.

I couldn't help but laugh at myself thinking the light splaying across the night sky could have been aliens. What a fool! Me and my magical thinking! Well at least I was alone this time with no one to bear witness to my foolishness. Lord knows I had been called gullible and naive most of my life. Being so had left me feeling silly, even stupid at times.

Even so it was these same qualities which allowed me the gift of trusting others. Of expecting the best from those I encountered. Of seeking the good in all and allowing for second and sometimes even third chances. At that moment I realized I lived in wonder. A childlike wonder most adults leave far behind. It was that same wonder that allowed me to see what most others miss. To stand in my own yard on a winter night frozen in awe of the beauty of a halogen bulb and ice crystals.

What would drive me to empty a camera bag at 4AM , praying for an old roll of film? The passion I felt rushing through my entire body as I imagined the shot. The deep desire to share the beauty with those I loved. To capture the manifestation of God on film. These were the thoughts filling my head as I grew sleepy, heavy, ready for rest. I thought of Tom presenting me with my first 35mm camera, how proud I was. And his words, "Keep it at the ready. You never know when God's gonna provide you with that perfect shot."

With no warning, sleep swallowed me.